TAKE THE POLL: When you go out on a second date, who should pay?

November 6, 2019

I received a text from a friend asking if she should have paid for drinks on her second date and was genuinely surprised that she would even think that she should pay for anything so soon into a courtship.

So I told her what my mother taught me about men and money when I first started dating. They guy pays and he gets the pleasure of your company --- whether you're going to the movies or flying to Florida, if he's inviting you, he's paying. And a woman is not to feel obligated to reciprocate in any way.

But then I started wondering if there are a lot of women in their 20s who think they should bear some financial responsibility for dating in the start of a relationship. You could argue the rules have changed, and what if he makes less money, or I feel more independent/in control when I pick up the tab. But I say, if he's making a decent wage and wants to get to know you, it's on him until you feel otherwise.

Who should pay on a second date?

If she wants to buy drinks, that's nice. But she shouldn't do more.
43% (12 votes)
The guy always pays, duh. Until you've been dating for a couple months.
36% (10 votes)
She should pay for sure.
14% (4 votes)
I would never let a woman pay on a date.
7% (2 votes)
Total votes: 28